Awestruck Wonder

"How great are His signs, And how mighty His wonders! His kingdom is an everlasting kingdom, And His dominion is from generation to generation." Daniel 4:3

It’s weird . . . April 2, 2008

Filed under: Change — steveamy @ 14:19

how marriage changes you. Makes you more you. More him.

It’s also weird how I have a recent penchant for talking that makes the old hunger to write slip away.  A man replaces my journal, hears and helps me process the thoughts that used to flow to paper.  And here my blog would stagnate if it weren’t for my hubby who keeps it faithfully updated! 

It’s weird how marriage changes you.

Steve now likes peanut butter.  Like crazy.  Huh?!  And I joke about farts and burps, because without a sense of humor, I could probably go mad.  Steve also likes to help me in the kitchen, which is yet another reason to marvel, while I am actually becoming somewhat computer literate and understand financial issues with a tiny glimmering of insight I have never had before. Wonder of wonders, Steve actually knows how to keep a secret and somedays I believe I actually see a veil of tact creep over his conversations.  And my independence is slowly learning to melt to the dearest person on earth which gives me hope that it may give way to others in the future as well!

Babies change you too, even though they are only 15 weeks developed in the womb.  They make you have hopes and dreams and fears and longings you’ve never had with that intensity.  They make you read the baby books for hours on end and talk to other parents about kids and glean every shred of insight from the people you hear talking every day.  They make you do searches on google you’ve never done before and look forward to medical appointments with excitement.  They make your husband so happy he tells everyone he sees and interested in things he has never even thought about.  They make your belly stick out and yor body change with a speed and urgency that it has never had before.

Experiences change you.  Both pleasant ones and hard ones. They make you grow further away from God, or closer Him.  They draw you closer to people, or farther away from them.  They make you think about things in new ways or else foolishly cling to what is familiar and routine.  They give you hope and courage as you see the faithfulness of God or else they make you waver and fear as you are blinded to it.  They teach the willing learner humility and patience or they help the willing stubborn-hearted produce even more pride.  They give you new tastes and attractions, either good or bad.  They give you new fears and revulsions, either good or bad.  One or the other.  Good or bad. It’s your choice.  

And still, you are you.  And even more you, whether more like your old nature or whether you are more as God created you to be. 

It’s weird how connection to Jesus changes you.  Makes you more you.  More HIM.